{"id":89763,"date":"2025-02-15T13:47:08","date_gmt":"2025-02-15T13:47:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/som2nynetwork.com\/business\/finance\/582-the-marriage-contract-you-never-saw-but-cant-escape-with-harvard-law-alum-aaron-thomas\/"},"modified":"2025-02-15T13:47:08","modified_gmt":"2025-02-15T13:47:08","slug":"582-the-marriage-contract-you-never-saw-but-cant-escape-with-harvard-law-alum-aaron-thomas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/som2nynetwork.com\/?p=89763","title":{"rendered":"#582: The Marriage Contract You Never Saw (But Can&#8217;t Escape), with Harvard Law Alum Aaron Thomas"},"content":{"rendered":"<p> <br \/>\n<\/p>\n<div>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-13417\" src=\"https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-200x300.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"200\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-200x300.png 200w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-683x1024.png 683w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-768x1152.png 768w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-1024x1536.png 1024w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1.png 1365w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-320x480.png 320w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-400x600.png 400w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-667x1000.png 667w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-600x900.png 600w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-480x720.png 480w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-1200x1800.png 1200w, https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/02\/AaronThomas-Headshot-1-800x1200.png 800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 200px) 100vw, 200px\"\/>They had it all. Six thriving children. A 40-year marriage. A household income of $200,000.<\/p>\n<p>Then in her 60s, she discovered a shocking truth: he had gambled away their entire retirement savings in penny stocks.<\/p>\n<p>She had no access to their financial accounts during the marriage. After divorcing, she was left with nearly nothing. Today, she relies on her adult kids for support.<\/p>\n<p>Harvard-trained family law attorney Aaron Thomas joins us for a Valentine\u2019s Day discussion about prenuptial agreements \u2014 not just as divorce insurance, but as a framework for building stronger marriages.<\/p>\n<p>Thomas is a three-time winner of Atlanta\u2019s Best Divorce Attorney and a leading expert in family law. He\u2019s the founder of prenups.com and authored The Prenup Prescription.<\/p>\n<p>Thomas explains that every married couple already has a prenup by default: their state\u2019s laws. In 41 states, judges have broad discretion in dividing assets \u201cequitably\u201d \u2014 which might mean a 70-30 split rather than 50-50. The remaining nine states are community property states, where assets are typically split equally.<\/p>\n<p>But even in community property states, determining what qualifies as joint property can spark fierce debate. For example: if you entered marriage with $100,000 in a 401(k) and continued contributing during the marriage, how much belongs to you vs. the marriage? What about a home you owned before marriage, but your spouse helped pay the mortgage?<\/p>\n<p>To prevent financial surprises, Thomas recommends couples hold \u201cannual shareholder meetings\u201d to review finances together. He suggests creating three buckets \u2014 yours, mine and ours \u2014 with clear agreements about spending. For example, his prenup requires both spouses to approve joint account purchases over $500.<\/p>\n<p>Beyond asset division, prenups can include requirements like marriage counseling before filing for divorce, or mediation if custody disputes arise. While prenups can\u2019t determine child custody or support payments, they can establish frameworks for working through conflict.<\/p>\n<p>The biggest benefit, Thomas argues, isn\u2019t protecting yourself in case of divorce \u2014 it\u2019s creating clarity and communication during marriage. By having difficult conversations upfront about money, expectations and conflict resolution, couples build stronger foundations for lasting partnerships.<\/p>\n<p>Listen to this episode to hear our full conversation about how prenups can strengthen marriages, prevent costly court battles, and help couples align on money management from day one.<\/p>\n<p><strong><u>Timestamps:<\/u><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Note: Timestamps will vary on individual listening devices based on dynamic advertising run times. The provided timestamps are approximate and may be several minutes off due to changing ad lengths.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>(0:00) Episode intro and the hidden marriage contract<\/p>\n<p>(3:01) Legal definition of marriage and financial rights<\/p>\n<p>(12:42) Historical view: marriage as duty vs love<\/p>\n<p>(19:38) Prenups defined: financial rules for marriage<\/p>\n<p>(24:20) Annual money meetings between spouses<\/p>\n<p>(27:26) Why \u201ceverything is 50\/50\u201d is a myth<\/p>\n<p>(35:21) How separate property becomes marital property<\/p>\n<p>(39:26) Real examples: retirement accounts and homes<\/p>\n<p>(44:44) State prenup vs your own prenup<\/p>\n<p>(48:04) Using prenups for counseling and mediation<\/p>\n<p>(55:07) Pets in divorce: property not custody<\/p>\n<p>(57:30) Family loans and spending limits<\/p>\n<p>(1:01:57) Financial transparency prevents disasters<\/p>\n<p>(1:07:21) Community property vs equitable division<\/p>\n<p>(1:10:34) Why every couple needs money agreements<\/p>\n<p>(1:14:51) Postnups and no-nups explained<\/p>\n<p><strong>Resources Mentioned:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/prenups.com\/\">Home \u2013 Prenups<\/a> | Website<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/prenupguy\/\">Prenups.com (@prenupguy) <\/a>| Instagram<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/prenups.com\/paula\/\">Book Your 30-Minute Consultation Today \u2013 Afford Anything \u2013 Prenups<\/a> | Website<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/41eM5Me\">The Prenup Prescription<\/a> | Book<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1103\" src=\"https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/listen-to-afford-anything-on-itunes.png\" alt=\"listen to afford anything on itunes\" width=\"150\" height=\"38\"\/><a href=\"https:\/\/subscribeonandroid.com\/paulaandjaymoney.libsyn.com\/rss\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-1104\" src=\"https:\/\/affordanything.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/subscribe-on-android-afford-anything.png\" alt=\"subscribe on android afford anything\" width=\"110\" height=\"40\"\/><\/a><\/p>\n<hr\/>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n<p>Thanks to our sponsors!<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.netsuite.com\/paula\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>NetSuite<\/strong><\/a><br \/>NetSuite is the number one cloud financial system, bringing accounting, financial management, inventory, HR, into ONE platform, and ONE source of truth. Head to\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/www.netsuite.com\/paula\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>NetSuite.com\/PAULA\u00a0<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0and download the CFO\u2019s Guide to AI and Machine Learning.<\/p>\n<hr\/>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.shopify.com\/free-trial?utm_campaign=paid_audio_-_podcast_-_amer_-_united_states_-_all_-_experimential_-_english_-_awareness&amp;utm_source=podcast&amp;utm_medium=audio&amp;utm_term=paula\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>Shopify<\/strong><\/a><br \/>Diversify your business by selling physical and digital products through Shopify\u2019s all-in-one platform. Go to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.shopify.com\/free-trial?utm_campaign=paid_audio_-_podcast_-_amer_-_united_states_-_all_-_experimential_-_english_-_awareness&amp;utm_source=podcast&amp;utm_medium=audio&amp;utm_term=paula\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>shopify.com\/paula<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0for a one dollar a month trial period for three months.<\/p>\n<hr\/>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/policygenius.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>Policygenius<\/strong><\/a><br \/>Go to\u00a0<strong><a href=\"https:\/\/policygenius.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">policygenius.com<\/a>\u00a0<\/strong>for free quotes and comparisons. With Policygenius, you can find life insurance policies that start at just $292 per year for $1 million of coverage.<\/p>\n<p><span id=\"tve_leads_end_content\" style=\"display: block; visibility: hidden; border: 1px solid transparent;\"\/><\/div>\n<p><script>\n!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s)\n{if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?\nn.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};\nif(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;n.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';\nn.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;\nt.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];\ns.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,document,'script',\n'https:\/\/connect.facebook.net\/en_US\/fbevents.js');\n fbq('init', '734200020246481'); \nfbq('track', 'PageView');\n<\/script><script async src=\"\/\/www.instagram.com\/embed.js\"><\/script><br \/>\n<br \/><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>They had it all. Six thriving children. A 40-year marriage. A household income of $200,000. Then in her 60s, she discovered a shocking truth: he had gambled away their entire retirement savings in penny stocks. She had no access to their financial accounts during the marriage. After divorcing, she was left with nearly nothing. Today, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":89764,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[93],"tags":[15623,43280,13536,6439,37479,12685,4336,7455],"dealstore":[],"offerexpiration":[],"class_list":["post-89763","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-finance","tag-aaron","tag-alum","tag-contract","tag-escape","tag-harvard","tag-law","tag-marriage","tag-thomas"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>#582: The Marriage Contract You Never Saw (But Can&#039;t Escape), with Harvard Law Alum Aaron Thomas - Som2ny Network<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/som2nynetwork.com\/?p=89763\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"#582: The Marriage Contract You Never Saw (But Can&#039;t Escape), with Harvard Law Alum Aaron Thomas - Som2ny Network\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"They had it all. Six thriving children. A 40-year marriage. A household income of $200,000. Then in her 60s, she discovered a shocking truth: he had gambled away their entire retirement savings in penny stocks. She had no access to their financial accounts during the marriage. After divorcing, she was left with nearly nothing. 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Six thriving children. A 40-year marriage. A household income of $200,000. Then in her 60s, she discovered a shocking truth: he had gambled away their entire retirement savings in penny stocks. She had no access to their financial accounts during the marriage. After divorcing, she was left with nearly nothing. 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