An Adventure on a Duck Pond

I introduced myself to Andrew, the organiser from The Friends of Bromley Town Parks and Gardens. Two other volunteers had also come along to help clean up the shore. Andrew was the kind of eager, passionate person we need to turn outrage into action, complete with sensible things like hand sanitiser, hi-vis, and health and safety forms. The world needs more people like Andrew.

Three police officers arrived as Andrew and I were inflating our paddleboards. I assumed our little mission was about to be shut down— for trespassing, health and safety, or something equally tedious.

But no. The police were delighted we were going to clean the pond. They were fully supportive.

I pulled on my wellies, rubber gloves and very important hi-vis vest, then paddled out onto one of the rankest, skankiest, mankiest, dankest, smelliest bodies of water I’ve ever had the pleasure of floating on.

We joked about whether this was a world-first expedition—the first-ever paddleboarding outing on the Bromley duck pond.

And then we got to work, filling bag after bag with the usual suspects of Lucozade and Coca-Cola bottles, McDonalds’ cups, and the compulsory traffic-cones-lobbed-into-ponds-for-a-laugh.