“I may have found a solution to the Wife Problem.”
Don Tillman, a thirty-nine year old, tenured, genetics professor working in Melbourne, believed when growing up that, as an adult, he would acquire: a job, a house, a wife. The last of these has proved troublesome to find. Don has always been aware that he is regarded as different. With the help of his two friends, Gene and Claudia, he meets women from time to time and attempts to interact with them in ways they will not find offensive. Nevertheless, he has never managed to secure a second date. His efficiently organised lifestyle, logic and honesty are not generally appreciated.
Narrated by Don, this story is a warm hearted and entertaining journey through the minefield of life that society expects everyone to navigate alone and without a map. Advice may be available but it is not always sound or wise. Don has had many negative experiences, suffering ridicule alongside rejection. As a scientist he retains the belief that if he can just uncover a way to filter out early those clearly not compatible he has a chance of finding a partner who could put up with him. He struggles to understand what triggers the complex emotions he observes in others, including love.
Don creates a questionnaire that potential dates must fill in and puts it online. It becomes clear there are a dearth of suitable candidates. Gene decides to help out with the filtering process (including photographs – a detail Don did not request as he regards aesthetics merely a way of spotting those lax about their health). When Rosie shows up in his office, telling him Gene sent her, Don assumes she has passed through the Wife Project filter and asks her to dinner. The first problem encountered isn’t to do with Rosie but the jacket he wears to the high end restaurant she jokingly suggested and he took at face value.
“My Gore-Tex jacket, the high-technology garment that had protected me in rain and snowstorms, was being irrationally, unfairly and obstructively contrasted with the official’s essentially decorative woollen equivalent. I had paid $1,015 for it, including $120 extra for the customised reflective yellow, I outlined my argument.”
Rosie is clearly unsuitable based on Don’s stated criteria. For a start, she is a smoker. Nevertheless he is drawn to her. He ponders if this is to do with his interest in helping her find her biological father. As a geneticist he is in a position to be useful. His problem solving skills are also an asset. What surprises him is how easy he then finds it to act in ways he never before considered possible – to break rules and abandon the weekly schedules that help him navigate all the time to be passed in a life he has often been unhappy with.
Don is a fabulous creation. Although fairly extreme in his difference and struggles with empathy there are so many situations encountered that readers will recognise. These are not limited to conversations with potential dates – trying to work out if there is any interest without being accused of harassment. Rosie regularly displays unexpected emotions triggered by the carefully worded responses Don gives to her questions, answers he was trying to ensure were what he thought she, as a modern feminist, would want to hear.
A tender, poignant exploration of the difficulties encountered finding a partner in the modern world. It is obvious that romance is not portrayed realistically in most stories and films. This book is a reminder that it can still exist for those willing to accept that in reality we are all unique – different – and that need not be a bad thing.
The Rosie Project is published by Penguin.
