A Visit to the Alnwick Poison Garden – Mate, we’re lost!

Recently I have really been into murder mystery novels or Whodunit books. There is something satisfying about getting an ending where everything fits together perfectly, where all the puzzle pieces all of a sudden come together and the full story is told.

So, naturally, when I came across the Poison Garden in Alnwick (damn you targeted ads) I had to add it to our recent Scotland trip. Thankfully, being in the upper most reaches of England, it was on our way 😀

The Poison garden

Even the name sounds ominous, doesn’t it?

Once you enter the Alnwick Garden, turn left and follow the path. It will lead you to black cast iron gates with skulls on it. Before entering, the guide will warn you not to touch, smell or, god forbid, eat any of the plants.

You have been warned!

It all sounds super scary and dangerous which is probably why I found it a bit underwhelming. With all this hype, you expect some exotic poisonous plants that will kill you in an instant. Instead, you see plants that you will find in almost any wilder garden.

One of the most popular plants down the Mediterranean coast, oleander, is considered one of the “worst offenders” and is put in a cage. Even the gorgeous blossoms didn’t save it from the naughty list of one of the most toxic plants widely spread.

Apart from oleander there are plants like chard, stinging nettles, tobacco, poppies (we all know about milk of the poppy :D)… I think at least 50% of the plants I saw are used in homeopathic remedies as well.

I can’t say I learned a lot during this tour as I already knew about 90% of the plants. Or maybe this is just my impostor syndrome rearing its ugly head telling me that because I know this, everyone else does? In any case, this made me think this tour would be more suitable for kids and teens as these plants really can be found everywhere and are dangerous if you don’t know them.

Maybe that’s the point of the whole tour, how even an innocent looking plant growing in the ditch by the road can kill you if you’re not careful.

A lot of these plants can be found as murder weapons in Agatha Christie novels – belladonna, cyanide, monkshood, morphine… The woman did like her poisons.

I think they missed a trick by not mentioning Mrs Christie. Here we are, in a poison garden in England, the birth place of one of the most famous murder mystery authors out there (let’s face it, one of the most famous authors full stop) and not one word was said about her use of poisons as a preferred way of murder in her novels.

Doubtless, it’s also down to the guide, I think each guide has their own tour. For instance, I noticed we missed quite a few plants and barely mentioned serial killers that used poisons (a few of them are depicted on the wall of the garden)

The Alnwick garden

To get into the Poison Garden, you need to buy a ticket for Alnwick Garden. The price might seem steep, but it is worth it.

As soon as you enter, you are met with an amazing view of the main fountain. Walk through the green tunnels by the fountain and you will reach the Ornamental Garden. If you go to the left, you will see the black iron gates of the Poison Garden. Continue on your way and you will find yourself in the middle of the Cherry Orchard with big wooden swings to take you back to your childhood.

If you decide to go right, you can choose to lose yourself in a Bamboo Labyrinth, smell the Rose gardens or discover the Serpent garden.

The whole place is absolutely perfect for kids, from little tractors to drive around or sowing seeds in the spooky cottage to getting lost in a labyrinth and playing in the sandpit.

some useful info

Alnwick Castle and Gardens are just off the A1 north of Newcastle. There is loads of parking, but they charge a small day fee that is not included in the entrance fee.

Buy your garden tickets online before you get there. You will save money and time queuing to buy them at the spot.

You can enter the Poison garden only via a guided tour. Tours are about every 30 minutes. It is first come first serve – you will need to get in the queue for the tour. Only first 20 people go in and they count toddlers as people if not in their strollers. Once you get in the queue, you can’t leave unless someone stays there to hold a place for you.

Apart from the Alnwick Garden, you can visit the Alnwick Castle, Lilidorei and The Treehouse. All of them are separate tickets apart from Treehouse which is free. Oh and kids under 16 go free as well.

I might have been a bit disappointed with the Poison Garden, but we all whole-heartedly enjoyed our few hours at Alnwick Garden and will visit again when in the area. Hopefully, we’ll be able to stay longer and enjoy a drink in the sun without having a 300 mile trip ahead of us.