When Memes Go Too Far: Speaking the Truth in Love

Most of us have probably been there: scrolling through social media, laughing at a clever meme someone shared, only to realize it includes something objectionable, perhaps some crude humor or inappropriate language. Well-meaning, even vigilant, Christians can share memes without spotting these details. At some time or another, most of us have probably hit the share button without noticing something objectionable in the post. 

All Christians know that Paul warns about corrupting talk (Ephesians 4:29). He uses the Greek word sapros, which carries the idea of something rotting, decaying, and unpleasant. This kind of language is not merely unpleasant—it is spiritually toxic and reveals a deeper issue within the heart. Jesus indicates that what comes out of our mouths indicates who we are on the inside (Matthew 15:18). Rot-filled speech likely means that a person is decaying spiritually. 

I think the basic idea behind the New Testament teaching on corrupt speech could also include unvoiced humor, social media posts, and memes. So, it applies not only to what we say but also to what we communicate. A meme might be funny or relatable in some way, but if it includes something ungodly, it sends a mixed message about us.

Let’s look at another aspect of this issue. How do we respond when we see offensive content shared by another Christian? For the sake of our post, let’s assume that the content has been shared by mistake. Let’s look at two contrasting approaches.

First, we can assume that the person shared it intentionally and rebuke them accordingly. We can get on our high horse and treat the other person with the condescension they so richly deserve. I had this happen recently. I shared a meme that had a three-letter abbreviation for an objectionable phrase. I mistook it for a similarly spelled word when I read it over and shared it; unfortunately, I did so without realizing my error. Someone on Facebook messaged me, letting me know in no uncertain terms how offended she was by my post, even including a screenshot to make sure I wouldn’t miss it. I took the post down immediately and had no further contact with her. 

The other option is to assume that the person made a mistake. A few months ago, I shared a meme that was not objectionable but came from a source with an objectionable word in the screen name. It was smaller print, and once again I missed it. Very quickly, a Facebook friend I had never met in person messaged me, starting with “Hey, I don’t know if you knew this, but …” I was horrified, and I immediately took down the post as quickly as my fumbling fingers would permit. Her message reminded me of Paul’s statement, “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt” (Colossians 4:6). We messaged back and forth, me offering an apology and her thanking me and saying she knew it was probably just a slip-up on my part. I thanked her profusely, and we went on about our days. 

I don’t think you’ll have any difficulty determining which response satisfied both a passion for truth that prompts us to engage with others who have stumbled (Luke 17:3) but also the need to do so with the graciousness the New Testament requires (Galatians 6:1).

Many of us share things online. Sooner or later, even the most careful may let something slip beneath the radar. If you find something objectionable posted online, you can never go wrong assuming the best and approaching the person with gentleness. This is the spirit behind the advice, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1). This proverb tells us how to handle anger once it’s come out, but we can also use it preemptively, can’t we? 

Levelling accusations, complaining, and broadcasting how offended we are is much less helpful than employing a spirit of meekness (the very definition of which is “strength under control”). Anyone can throw a temper tantrum or let loose a self-righteous tirade. It takes much more control and Christlikeness to approach someone with gentleness.

We all appreciate grace when we receive it; this is a universal human response. For those of us trying to imitate Christ, the real test is not only how ready we are to receive grace but also how quickly we are willing to give it.