My Roommate is a Vampire by Jenna Levine

True love is at stake in this charming, debut romantic comedy.

Cassie Greenberg loves being an artist, but it’s a tough way to make a living. On the brink of eviction, she’s desperate when she finds a too-good-to-be-true apartment in a beautiful Chicago neighborhood. Cassie knows there has to be a catch—only someone with a secret to hide would rent out a room for that price.

Of course, her new roommate Frederick J. Fitzwilliam is far from normal. He sleeps all day, is out at night on business, and talks like he walked out of a regency romance novel. He also leaves Cassie heart-melting notes around the apartment, cares about her art, and asks about her day. And he doesn’t look half bad shirtless, on the rare occasions they’re both home and awake. But when Cassie finds bags of blood in the fridge that definitely weren’t there earlier, Frederick has to come clean…

Cassie’s sexy new roommate is a vampire. And he has a proposition for her.

That was one hot mess! Most of this book was cringeworthy for me. Frederick is such a simp, and Cassie has pretty much no redeeming qualities. I found Frederick’s lack of understanding of the modern world to be endearing, and his proper behaviors and mannerisms were amusing. He was cute in a Leopold from Kate & Leopold kind of way (although he’s no Hugh Jackman). I did not like Cassie, though. Her constant surprise that he likes her drove me nuts. “Who me? Little old me? I’m nothing special, how could he like me?” Over and over again. She was constantly begging for compliments and not believing any of them. A person would have to be dumber than a rock to not know that a guy like Frederick is in love with them. And I have no idea why he loved her either. Like, he just fell in love with her for no reason other than that she was there and he was incredibly isolated. He would have fallen in love with anyone. There was no romantic development, no world-building, no vampire lore, and no real depth to this story. I know nothing interesting about any of these characters. The dialogue is so cheesy and over the top. The major conflict was cartoonish and ridiculous.

I did like the epistolatory aspects of the story. Frederick and Cassie talk through written notes for a while because of their differing sleeping schedules, and the letters were fun for a time.

Audio notes: The narration was horrible. Frederick sounds irritatingly posh with an American accent, even though he’s British. His mother, also British, actually has a British accent and sounds like a high and mighty snob. Cassie sounds like a child. And then Reginald, Frederick’s frenemy, sounds like some empty-headed frat boy.

Bottom line, this book is a train wreck. And I couldn’t look away, hence the two stars instead of one. lol.