You hang in the balance. And the scales communicate your lack of control. You disengage and distract to keep from worrying or bracing yourself for constant disappointment. But— when the quite comes, you feel the weight of your waiting and you wonder.
Maybe we are meaning-makers, driven to explain the mysteries of life. We construct scenarios, often beginning with ‘maybe it’s because…’. While this quest for understanding can bring comfort, it can also be treacherous. Some narratives can seep into our sense of self, shaping our identity in ways that may not be true, holding us hostage.
But when our hearts are orientated upon the missing thing, it’s like our hands wrapping around the wind. Our hope is hollow, and it can’t hold the weight of our questions, our anguish, our disappointment. It will tell us lies about who we are, and it will threaten to cover us with shame.
Friends, anchor your heart in God’s presence today. Bring your questions, anguish, and pain to Him in prayer. Allow God to help you carry the weight of your burdens. We are ever-changing, He is unchanging. In this New year, draw near to Him, cling to His word and be transformed daily. 
May you find peace in His presence. Amen. God bless! 
Blessings and love…
