Sometimes we need to break unfair rules
Life is not fair. And there are occasions when we must break unfair rules.
But coloring outside the lines is always more fun. Now this statement poses two challenges for me. One is coloring. I am colorblind, vision-impaired, and astigmatic. Two, I can’t read with my right eye. And thus, adhering to lines is not my thing.
I remember when I was five years old, my mom took me to an art competition that was held in the park close to our house. Each child was given a sheet of paper, a watercolor palette, a pencil, and an eraser.
Now, my folks considered me artistic and assumed I would win. What they did not factor in was the fact I was good with black and white (and grey). But bring in the colors and we had a party on steroids on our hands.
I sketched impeccable scenery with mountains in the background, a rivulet streaming through the valley, tall trees, a boatman, and well, a polar bear. Go figure. The judge-y judges were strolling around, admiring the masterpieces by the tots. Sure enough, they looked at my sheet of paper, smiled at me, ruffled my hair, whispered to each other, and moved on.
The time came to color my sketch. Things went downhill from there. In theory, I did know tree trunks were supposed to be brown, leaves green, skies blue, and so on. In reality, I did not know the difference between brown and green (and red), or blue, violet and all the shades in that family, or orange, yellow, and light green. Tears threatened but I stoically persevered and colored diligently with what appeared to me the right colors.
All I got was puzzled looks for coloring within the lines as my mom had taught me to, and another pat on the back, and more whispered comments.
On the way home, Mom hugged me and said it was fine. Well, we were already aware I had short sight and astigmatism. A visit to the ophthalmologist confirmed that I was colorblind. My mom assured me I was exceptional, what with the condition being rare in women.
Should we break unfair rules?
I did learn, though, early, that it was okay to color outside the lines, especially when it came to a choice between right and wrong. When it is about following rules, I am all for it, while following traffic rules and the law. As for being conventional, not so much, unless you count not wanting to wear ripped jeans or a pant waistline that shows my butt cleavage.
By tradition, in our community, girls are expected to marry by the time they’re 21. I defied that and insisted I would marry when I felt like it. When they tried to force me into it, I simply upped and ran away from home at 20. I returned after ten days because I was bored, but I made my point. And enemies in the family. I ended up marrying when I was 33 to someone I chose.
My life is dotted with unconventional actions and connecting those dots. Today, I feel rather proud of myself for not giving in to rules that would have made me unhappy. Of course, I struggled to stand up for myself but thanks to my mom’s constant encouragement, I did.
And thus, my sales career saw me as the only woman on the team. Because I chose a career that was considered better suited for men, there were always challenges to face.
A week before my mom passed away, she told me that if her life were to end suddenly, I was to donate her body to a medical college. I remember laughing it off. But when faced with her unexpected death, and already devastated by the loss that I will never get over, I did manage to fulfill her wish. This time, our extended family was truly angry with this unconventional choice and stopped talking to me just because I broke the traditional unfair rules.
Coloring outside the lines is not easy, but so very satisfying. And I have learned that in life, sometimes it is necessary to break unfair rules, especially when they hurt more than help.
As for the colorblindness, I have learned some colors over the years, but I still get confused with some shades and get teased about it all the time. Ironically, I have a good eye for color when it comes to clothes or aesthetics in decor. Talk about the balance of life!
Thank you for reading ❤
Sometimes we need to break unfair rules was last modified: April 21st, 2025 by
