Fly On The Wall With The Queen Of Decluttering

September 23, 2026

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Welcome to another edition of Fly On The Wall group blog postings hosted by Karen of Baking In A Tornado. Today, three of us are welcoming you into our homes to see what a fly might see—or overhear!

The nosy fly already knows that since camping is still out of the question right now (hello, Florida heat!), we’ve just been hanging out with the family and our friends. We’re making the best of the hot days here — boat rides, midnight karaoke with our friends, relaxing by the pool, dining out, and hosting game nights. So far, it has been a lot of fun and very relaxing, which we need before hitting the road next month for our new RV adventures.

***(That photo is of a boat shaped like a car, ha-ha!)***

Before that, however, I just learned that Hub’s former work friends gifted us box seats at the Chiefs/Dolphins game on Sept. 27th!! We have never seen our beloved Chiefs play in R-L, so this is a bucket-list item I can finally check off!! GO CHIEFS!!!!

In the meantime, since my boss/editor is out of town for five weeks, work has been slooooooow this month. For years, my husband has been begging me to Marie Kondo our house, but I always had too many writing deadlines as my excuse. Well, not this month! I’ve done plenty of spring cleanings over the years, but nothing like what I’ve been doing for the past 2 weeks here. I always said I wished I could tip my house upside down and pour out all of the clutter, so basically, that’s what I’ve been doing. AND IT FEELS GREAT!!! We threw out at least 18 large garbage bags of stuff, and donated about 15 large bags to the Salvation Army (clothes, shoes, hats, books, glassware, jewelry, small appliances, artsy decor, toys, etc.). When I was younger, I never could part with my things because I thought I might use them again one day… but next month, I turn 67. I doubt I’ll need my squirrel figurine collection or re-read the extra 50+ books lying around the house. Nor will I ever fit back into those size 6 jeans or wear my sequin disco shirt again.

So here we are in the midst of decluttering our lives, and for the first time since I moved into this house 40 years ago, I know where EVERYTHING is! The fly has watched it all, and of course, has listened in on our conversations:

“Awwww, look what I found in the back of the closet — a box full of your old mementos!”

“I don’t remember any of it.”

“That’s why we have this memory box for you.”

“It’s more like my dementia-prevention box.”

“Why did you just stick a slice of processed turkey lunchmeat in my ear?”

“Because I’m exhausted from decluttering and needed a good laugh”

“The least you could have done was use low-sodium.”

“You should do some stretches with me before we tackle this mound of donation stuff that needs sorting. Stretch by touching your toes.”

“What toes? I haven’t been able to bend down far enough to see them in years.”

“That explains your hobbit toenails.”

“How about if you shave your head, mustache, and goatee? In fact, why not shave your bushy eyebrows while you’re at it?”

“If I did that, people would mistake my head for a bowling ball and hook their fingers in my nose to roll me down the alley.”

“I wanted to reward myself after all our hard work decluttering—but this 85% dark chocolate is gross. It’s too bitter.”

“But this kind of chocolate is supposed to be good for you.”

“Exactly why I don’t like it — nowadays everything that’s good for you tastes like crap.”

“I’m getting spammy emails for penis enhancements—and I don’t even have a penis.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t have a vagina either, but I’m getting vaginal reconstruction emails.”

“Maybe these spammers know something about us that we don’t”

“I’m trying to haul these bags of old junk out to the garbage, but there’s a large, male squirrel watching me from the trash can.. And he has a nut in his mouth.

“Hopefully he won’t grab HIS junk and tell you that he has a nut for YOU.”

“Do you think this is a good wine to go with the charcuterie board?”

“How would I know? I’m not a sommelier.”

“No, but you ARE a food sommelier.”

“I know you’re trying to stall to get out of cleaning these drawers with me, but what took you so long in the bathroom?”

“I was changing my colostomy bag.”

“You don’t have a colostomy bag.”

“Oops! Guess that explains the stain on my pants.”

“I need to sweep this messy closet out. Have you seen the broom anywhere?”

“Nope. Did you forget where you parked your ride?”

“That’s a lot of stuff in the giveaway bag. Why are you getting rid of all your Cubavera shirts?”

“Because now I’m Cubafatta.”

This queen of decluttering has worked her butt off, and I believe she deserves a nice mimosa brunch this weekend to celebrate her success. Hubs deserves some champagne, too—as long as he doesn’t bring a colostomy bag…

***WANT MORE MENO MAMA?*** Check out my latest recipe piece for AARP/The Girlfriend: Easy Fall Slow Cooker Recipes HERE If you’re looking for some good reads, I have another article up on AARP this week about the best books of 2026 (so far) that you can read HERE

Check out these other bloggers’ homes to see what the FLY has been up to!

Baking In A Tornado https://www.BakingInATornado.com

On the Border https://dlt-lifeontheranch.blogspot.com/